[ "He was ugly and short and had a micropenis" was the correct (but wildly untrue) answer, but alas. Iorveth does not actually hate Isengrim despite the fact that the guy vanished into thin air, which is perhaps his biggest failing.
That said "does not actually hate" is not the same as "love", which is the prevailing emotion Iorveth feels when Astarion hikes his chin up and tries to look haughty-threatening, which is an expression that sits very pretty on his pretty face. He has no doubt Astarion could scratch his eye out with his nails, which makes that lovely threat even better.
After a moment, he delivers his verdict: ] Happiness. [ Dramatic? Maybe. But again, as ever, it's his truth. ] You make me happy.
[ Which isn't to say that he was deeply unhappy with his past partners, but it wasn't a priority for Iorveth at all, the notion of being happy. If anything, personal happiness was something to be avoided; Iorveth mulls over that difference, fingers drumming gently over Astarion's stomach. ]
[ Astarion waits a moment, mulling the answer over in his head. 'Happiness'. What a small word for what Iorveth makes him feel. He isn't particularly inclined towards poeticism, but how he feels about Iorveth has to be too large to be contained in such a mundane word.
Still, it's the closest thing he has. He lets his hand slide atop Iorveth's. ]
I'm afraid you make me deliriously happy.
[ Hence why he's always so neurotic about their relationship. Iorveth gave him his first taste of happiness in two hundred years. The thought of ever having that ripped away from him makes him feel sick. ]
I just— I suppose I've a bit of trepidation about meeting the family.
[ Iorveth doesn't think Astarion's behavior is neurotic at all: it all rings very logical for Iorveth, who has constantly had everything good in his life taken from him by callous third parties with no respect for things he held sacred. Everything precious in his life, then, should be protected by force if necessary, and if someone like Astarion also expresses extreme protectiveness over the things that make him happy, well. Who is Iorveth to tell him to change?
No moderating force here, no objective perspective to tell them both to chill the fuck out. "Deliriously happy" makes Iorveth feel proud－ not of himself, but of Astarion and his capacity to feel that way－ so he turns his hand over under Astarion's, palm to palm with fingers loosely curled. ]
You're not a difficult man to like. Even Lae'zel was fond of you by the time we got to Moonrise.
[ A half-smile, remembering the rough start they all had. Iorveth didn't even really want to share a camp with those losers (affectionate) way back when. ]
...It's no small thing, that you still want to go north with me. That you want to learn my language, and that you've given these things thought.
[ "Meeting the family". Iorveth wonders if Astarion really understands what that sounds like, how some may interpret it. ]
[ Astarion is incredibly difficult to like, but he chooses not to correct Iorveth on that point. Still, he wonders if Iorveth can't remember just how much Astarion used to aggravate him. In the beginning, most of their conversations had been snipes. Maybe it does say something about his charm, he concedes, that he managed to turn those snipes into sweet nothings. Or maybe it just says something about Iorveth's poor taste in men. ]
Why wouldn't I have?
[ Of course he's given these things thought. He wants to fit into Iorveth's life, no matter how poorly-suited he may be to it. If he has to adapt, he'll adapt. ]
I thought you wanted to spend the rest of your irritatingly mortal lifespan with me.
[ So, obviously, when he thinks of the future, it's in that context. ]
[ Ah. "Irritatingly mortal" puts a damper on things, even if it's true. Iorveth sits up a little, finding a better vantage point from where he can gauge Astarion's expression, propped up on a pillow with his elbow resting on soft fabric. ]
I do. Four more centuries, give or take, if someone doesn't kill me first.
[ They sure can try. Iorveth reaches out to stroke Astarion's hair, brushing stray strands out of his face and behind his ear. ]
...My people will protect you, even after I die. I'll make sure of it.
[ Unless there's a cloak of immortality that they can find in Athkatla alongside Astarion's cloak of daywalking, Astarion will outlive Iorveth by the span of an eternity. Depressing. Astarion should probably find himself a vampire to love after this, so they can live with each other without fear of loss and longevity. Iorveth doesn't say so, because he doesn't want it to be taken the wrong way. ]
[ A lucky thing that they no longer have the tadpoles and their psionic connection, because Astarion has the fleeting thought that maybe he should have ascended after all and turned Iorveth. It's an ephemeral thought, because he knows Iorveth would despise him for it, but a thought all the same. Four centuries is nothing at all, and it'll fly by before they know it. Then Astarion will have the rest of eternity to be lonely.
A dark thought. He pulls the covers up a little further. ]
I don't want to be protected. I want to have you.
[ He would absolutely sacrifice every single one of Iorveth's people if it meant he could keep Iorveth forever. An inside thought that does not make it to the outside, because he doesn't want to be broken up with today. ]
[ Oh, this is bad. Somehow, erroneously, Iorveth had assumed that the promise of safety might appease Astarion somewhat, and that the prospect of having people to guarantee his wellbeing might lessen the blow of Iorveth's passing; not so, apparently. A first, by all metrics. As someone who has also endured atrocity, Iorveth doesn't take the value of security lightly.
So, again: this is bad. Iorveth watches Astarion curl further into their blankets and feels his heart do two diametrically opposing things: compact into a painfully tight ball while expanding ten sizes in his chest. It's the sort of feeling of love that hurts, the kind that tightens the back of his throat and makes him feel short on air. ]
If only I could, [ he finally says, running his fingertips over Astarion's cheek. ] I would never let loneliness touch you again.
[ Astarion deserves to be happy, to be blessed with companionship, to be able to share his time with others. Iorveth would do anything to make sure that Astarion is happy until the world collapses on itself, but he's just an elf.
(Somewhere in Athkatla, a cadre of hags and cambions sit bolt upright, sensing the existence of two dumb elves who might be persuaded into doing something very stupid in exchange for alluring promises. Hm.) ]
[ Astarion wants very badly to be angry at Iorveth for having the hypothetical gall to die in four hundred years. How dare he make Astarion love him, when he knew from the start that it was always going to be temporary! He can't, though, because he really does love Iorveth. So much that he can't even be upset with him for something that he supposes technically isn't his fault.
He does still want to be upset, though. It takes every ounce of maturity and self-control that he has (which is not much) not to throw a temper tantrum about Iorveth's mortality, but he manages it, only grinding his teeth unpleasantly. ]
...A problem we have four hundred years to solve, I'm sure.
[ Said with the utmost of scowls. He hates this. ]
[ Iorveth will take the L on this one― he is the one who crossed the line from "little tryst" to "serious attachment" first, and he is the one who will inevitably die first.
His hand stops ghosting over Astarion's cheek and settles more firmly against the jut of his tightly-clenched jaw. A thumb glides against the shapely outline, trying to coax Astarion to relax. ]
I'll do my utmost not to be killed.
[ Honestly, the only thing he can offer at this point. Coppers instead of gold. ]
Beloved. [ Tilting Astarion's face, just a fraction of a sliver. ] I do want to be with you until the end.
[ Astarion should count himself lucky to have had anyone who loved him at all, much less for four centuries. Once, not so long ago, he thought love was something that only existed for other people. Of course, he's ambitious at his core. What he has is never enough, and he'll always want more. More affection, more time, more Iorveth.
He leans his head into Iorveth's hand. ]
And I you.
[ Until his end, which will either be when he's finally murdered for being the shit he is or the sun burns out. Whichever. ]
...I just wish that your undying love were a bit more undying. Is that so wrong?
[ An echo of the man who wanted to steal absolute power from out under Cazador's feet. Ambition is terribly attractive on Astarion, with an emphasis on terrible― but perhaps that's just the nature of the proverbial beast. Always hungry.
His monstrous cat. Iorveth strokes Astarion's jaw again, and presses his lips to a cool temple. ]
Some would call it blasphemous. [ Trying to approximate Halsin's accent: ] "Against the natural order of things".
[ As a wood elf, he can agree: he was born, which means he should die. Again, this is probably where Iorveth should say something like "damn babe you're so right about everything", but he doesn't. Horrible.
That said, he does append: ] But Jaheira achieved some state of extended life somehow. It should stand to reason that I could do the same, if you still find yourself dissatisfied after a few decades.
[ Another kiss, between Astarion's furrowed brows. ]
[ Astarion doesn't give a shit about the 'natural order', or anything else that Halsin might care about. He himself is a violation of the natural order, after all. Not entirely willingly, yes, but all the same. No part of Iorveth letting him feed on his lifeblood is natural, and he doesn't seem to have a problem with that.
He allows the affection, although it doesn't quite soothe the frown lines on his face. Very intentionally, he shifts, lifting a hand and stroking Iorveth's cheek with the back of it, eyes as big and wide and sad as he can make them. He knows Iorveth is vulnerable to such things. ]
I was rather hoping you'd look into it now.
[ As if Astarion has the patience for a few decades. He already knows he wants to be with Iorveth forever and ever now. ]
[ Oh. That Look, coupled with the Touch. Before all this, he would have cast it aside as manipulation, might even have been offended that anyone could think that he could fall for something so blatant and possibly insincere. Actually, he would say so now, if anyone who wasn't Astarion appealed to him with doe eyes and lowered lashes.
But. It's Astarion. And while the tactics are underhanded, they're employed right after "I don't want protection, I want you", which is―
―ugh. Ugh!!! It's such a low blow. How fucking dare Astarion make Iorveth love him so much, honestly. A beat passes, the struggle visible on Iorveth's stoic face, before he, for the millionth time tonight, folds like paper. ]
...If you wish it. [ "Iorveth Say No to Astarion Challenge: Failed". ] You can think about whether you really want to utilize whatever we find, later.
[ Like, the possibility of Astarion falling out of love with him in a century's time is not zero, so. It doesn't hurt to be careful. ]
[ Astarion used to have to manipulate using sexuality, and now he only has to manipulate using a sad face. It's growth! In an instant, the wet cow eyes disappear, replaced with a grin breaking out across his face. Something Iorveth will only be able to see for a moment, because then Astarion is rolling over on top of him, tangling them up in the sheets, and kissing every inch of his precious face.
Iorveth should be rewarded for giving into him. It's one of his best qualities, as far as Astarion's concerned. ]
My love, [ he says in Aen Seidhe, still in that same horrible accent. ] You perfect man.
[ Oh, Part 2. A very quick recovery on Astarion's part. Iorveth makes an inelegant sound of surprise, but instinct has him wrap his arms around Astarion's middle and tip his chin into the assault of kisses, which says far too much about his current state of mind (that he is not, in fact, immune to bribes of affection from his most important person).
He does have the inclination to say something along the lines of "hey, were you paying any attention to a word I said after "if you wish it"????"; Astarion is adorable, but he often doesn't think before he leaps. That said, he is adorable, so it nullifies a good chunk of the vexing shortsightedness.
A sigh, warm and low, and Iorveth nips Astarion's chin with exasperated affection. ]
My impatient cat. [ Giving the small of his back a little pat, the way one would, yes, do to a fluffy feline sitting on one's lap. ] You're getting too used to me saying "yes", I think.
[ He absolutely was not paying attention to any word Iorveth said after 'if you wish it'. Why bother? He already heard what he wanted to hear: a concession.
Astarion kisses the sharp angle of Iorveth's jaw, intimate but without any heat behind it save for the warmth of fondness and affection. He kisses Iorveth's high cheekbone next, then the corner of his eye. Touching for the sake of touching, kissing for the sake of kissing. Things he never thought he'd be able to enjoy, much less things he ever thought he'd feel the urge to do. ]
Are you going to start saying 'no' to me, darling?
[ Ha. He better not. Astarion has spent a lifetime hearing nothing but 'no'. Iorveth's 'yes'es are the sweetest sound he's ever heard. ]
I should, [ is a very self-aware response. For the record, he'd like anyone who's keeping track (which is no one) to note that he does acknowledge that saying yes to someone all the time is not actually helpful.
That said: ] If only you didn't make it so difficult.
[ And if only it didn't feel so good to spoil Astarion rotten. Sigh. Sometimes he thinks about the atrocities that Cazador committed against someone who wears happiness so beautifully; if only they could make little copies of that rat bastard to occasionally conjure and step on.
Iorveth meets Astarion's next kiss with his mouth, just because he knows he can get away with it. ]
I was expected to be a "good influence". [ A ridiculous notion. ]
[ Iorveth, perpetually aware of their vaguely unhealthy relationship dynamic. Astarion, absolutely not giving a shit.
His lips meet Iorveth's enthusiastically, kiss firm and emphatic like he thinks he might be able to press Iorveth into the mattress with his kisses if he tries hard enough. He does love pinning Iorveth down with his weight so that he can't go anywhere. Is it toxic to like physically trapping your boyfriend so that he can't leave you? It's not like Astarion is going to stop, so the answer really doesn't matter. ]
By who?
[ Another kiss to the tip of his nose. ]
Not that I don't love your influence, of course.
[ But, you know, Iorveth is shockingly permissive of his bad behaviors. ]
[ Sweet summer child. Literally. For all of Lae'zel's hemming and hawwing and sharp-edged judgment, she was... what, two decades old? An infant. Wise beyond her years in some respects, but terribly naive in others. ]
Though, in hindsight, I think she may have been referring to my potential to influence your combat strategies, and not your behavior.
[ For example, if Iorveth really wanted Astarion to get off of him, he can think of five different ways he could do so, with each tactic increasing in brutality and pain. The sort of thing Lae'zel is into. Unfortunately, he is stupidly permissive of the pinning, and makes no move to shove the lukewarm body crushing him into the mattress. His lungs aren't thanking him, but he doesn't care. ]
[ Lae'zel may be wise beyond her years, but Astarion is the opposite. Terribly immature for someone in their second century of life. The comment makes him stop his assault of affection on Iorveth's face, and he scoffs, offended. ]
Excuse me—
[ This happens to be the exact way he sounds when he thinks a shopkeep or bartender isn't giving him good enough service. ]
What's wrong with my combat strategies?
[ The answer could probably be summed up in a question: what combat strategies? Strategy is for boring people. You don't need strategy when you have a sharp enough knife. ]
[ Astarion's combat strategy, Iorveth wisely doesn't say, closely mirrors a thoughtless lash-out by a cornered animal: bite first, think later. It's cute how he pouts, though, so Iorveth reaches up and takes Astarion's face between both hands, sandwiching his neat features in the cradle of callused palms. ]
You don't often think beyond the first stab.
[ A milder way to phrase his original thought. ] Which is why you get punched in the face more often than not.
[ Astarion is very good at getting up close and personal without the other party knowing. It's everything after that that requires a bit of work. ]
A good thing, that I usually work from distances. I can cover you.
[ Very rude of Iorveth. Astarion hasn't been punched in the face in so long! Unfortunately, he isn't able to become indignant about it, because he's too busy pressing his cheek into Iorveth's warm palm, charmed by the affection. Astarion has sharp claws, but at the end of the day, all he wants is to be petted gently by his favorite person. ]
Oh, are you going to protect me?
[ He turns his head, nuzzling into Iorveth's palm and kissing down his life line. Iorveth has created a monster, he thinks, one that's filled with embarrassingly warm and fuzzy feelings and can't stop himself from taking them out on every inch of Iorveth. ]
[ Protect Astarion, he means. If Astarion is a monstrous thing that soaks up attention like a sponge, Iorveth is a monstrous thing that supplies unhinged devotion in frankly unneeded quantities. Smiling at Astarion's willingness to settle in his hands, Iorveth trails his thumb just below one red eye― the one Iorveth is missing on his own face. ]
You, my most coveted and beloved. [ Said without a hint of embarrassment or self-consciousness. His truth will always be his truth, and he will always have unwarranted confidence about his beliefs. ] I'll protect you― not because I think you weak, but because it pleases me to see you safe.
[ A low hum, as he tickles behind Astarion's ear. ] You know, I nearly lost myself to rage when I thought those humans in Flotsam'd taken you from me.
[ Astarion has never really liked the idea of being protected. It conjures up the image of a little bird in a gilded cage, something too weak to fend for itself. At the end of the day, its protector can choose whether to keep it safe or to crush it in his hand. It's just a nicer-sounding form of danger, still a sword hanging precariously above him.
But the way that Iorveth says it, he supposes it doesn't sound so bad. Only from Iorveth can he ever think that something good doesn't come with strings attached. ]
Then you know how I feel when I think of mortality snatching you away.
[ The same, but different. More selfish, probably. He can't help what he is. ]
—Ugly of me, I suppose.
[ His beauty is only skin-deep, after all. Everything underneath is rather hideous. ]
But you've given me a reason to live, rather than just survive. I admit, I struggle to think of the future without you beside me.
[ The sensible thing to say is that it only feels that way because it's all so new, and in a century's time, Astarion will probably have acclimated to being his own self and may, in fact, be very much capable of moving on and letting Iorveth go if and when the time comes. An argument that sounds true, but may not necessarily be right.
A careful consideration of what to say later, and Iorveth lands on a middle ground. He doesn't often dabble in these. ]
Time may grant you more perspective. [ Relinquishing his Astarion sandwich to comb through silver hair. He knows what this might sound like, though－ an out, which Iorveth has learned that Astarion does not like－ so he has a follow-up. ] ...But I, in turn, struggle to think of a future in which you're alone.
[ He hates it, actually. ]
So you'll have me for as long as you need me. And if you need me for longer than my prescripted years, we'll see what can be done. Challenges do intrigue me.
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That said "does not actually hate" is not the same as "love", which is the prevailing emotion Iorveth feels when Astarion hikes his chin up and tries to look haughty-threatening, which is an expression that sits very pretty on his pretty face. He has no doubt Astarion could scratch his eye out with his nails, which makes that lovely threat even better.
After a moment, he delivers his verdict: ] Happiness. [ Dramatic? Maybe. But again, as ever, it's his truth. ] You make me happy.
[ Which isn't to say that he was deeply unhappy with his past partners, but it wasn't a priority for Iorveth at all, the notion of being happy. If anything, personal happiness was something to be avoided; Iorveth mulls over that difference, fingers drumming gently over Astarion's stomach. ]
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Still, it's the closest thing he has. He lets his hand slide atop Iorveth's. ]
I'm afraid you make me deliriously happy.
[ Hence why he's always so neurotic about their relationship. Iorveth gave him his first taste of happiness in two hundred years. The thought of ever having that ripped away from him makes him feel sick. ]
I just— I suppose I've a bit of trepidation about meeting the family.
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No moderating force here, no objective perspective to tell them both to chill the fuck out. "Deliriously happy" makes Iorveth feel proud－ not of himself, but of Astarion and his capacity to feel that way－ so he turns his hand over under Astarion's, palm to palm with fingers loosely curled. ]
You're not a difficult man to like. Even Lae'zel was fond of you by the time we got to Moonrise.
[ A half-smile, remembering the rough start they all had. Iorveth didn't even really want to share a camp with those losers (affectionate) way back when. ]
...It's no small thing, that you still want to go north with me. That you want to learn my language, and that you've given these things thought.
[ "Meeting the family". Iorveth wonders if Astarion really understands what that sounds like, how some may interpret it. ]
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Why wouldn't I have?
[ Of course he's given these things thought. He wants to fit into Iorveth's life, no matter how poorly-suited he may be to it. If he has to adapt, he'll adapt. ]
I thought you wanted to spend the rest of your irritatingly mortal lifespan with me.
[ So, obviously, when he thinks of the future, it's in that context. ]
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I do. Four more centuries, give or take, if someone doesn't kill me first.
[ They sure can try. Iorveth reaches out to stroke Astarion's hair, brushing stray strands out of his face and behind his ear. ]
...My people will protect you, even after I die. I'll make sure of it.
[ Unless there's a cloak of immortality that they can find in Athkatla alongside Astarion's cloak of daywalking, Astarion will outlive Iorveth by the span of an eternity. Depressing. Astarion should probably find himself a vampire to love after this, so they can live with each other without fear of loss and longevity. Iorveth doesn't say so, because he doesn't want it to be taken the wrong way. ]
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A dark thought. He pulls the covers up a little further. ]
I don't want to be protected. I want to have you.
[ He would absolutely sacrifice every single one of Iorveth's people if it meant he could keep Iorveth forever. An inside thought that does not make it to the outside, because he doesn't want to be broken up with today. ]
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So, again: this is bad. Iorveth watches Astarion curl further into their blankets and feels his heart do two diametrically opposing things: compact into a painfully tight ball while expanding ten sizes in his chest. It's the sort of feeling of love that hurts, the kind that tightens the back of his throat and makes him feel short on air. ]
If only I could, [ he finally says, running his fingertips over Astarion's cheek. ] I would never let loneliness touch you again.
[ Astarion deserves to be happy, to be blessed with companionship, to be able to share his time with others. Iorveth would do anything to make sure that Astarion is happy until the world collapses on itself, but he's just an elf.
(Somewhere in Athkatla, a cadre of hags and cambions sit bolt upright, sensing the existence of two dumb elves who might be persuaded into doing something very stupid in exchange for alluring promises. Hm.) ]
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He does still want to be upset, though. It takes every ounce of maturity and self-control that he has (which is not much) not to throw a temper tantrum about Iorveth's mortality, but he manages it, only grinding his teeth unpleasantly. ]
...A problem we have four hundred years to solve, I'm sure.
[ Said with the utmost of scowls. He hates this. ]
Give or take. If you aren't killed first.
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His hand stops ghosting over Astarion's cheek and settles more firmly against the jut of his tightly-clenched jaw. A thumb glides against the shapely outline, trying to coax Astarion to relax. ]
I'll do my utmost not to be killed.
[ Honestly, the only thing he can offer at this point. Coppers instead of gold. ]
Beloved. [ Tilting Astarion's face, just a fraction of a sliver. ] I do want to be with you until the end.
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He leans his head into Iorveth's hand. ]
And I you.
[ Until his end, which will either be when he's finally murdered for being the shit he is or the sun burns out. Whichever. ]
...I just wish that your undying love were a bit more undying. Is that so wrong?
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His monstrous cat. Iorveth strokes Astarion's jaw again, and presses his lips to a cool temple. ]
Some would call it blasphemous. [ Trying to approximate Halsin's accent: ] "Against the natural order of things".
[ As a wood elf, he can agree: he was born, which means he should die. Again, this is probably where Iorveth should say something like "damn babe you're so right about everything", but he doesn't. Horrible.
That said, he does append: ] But Jaheira achieved some state of extended life somehow. It should stand to reason that I could do the same, if you still find yourself dissatisfied after a few decades.
[ Another kiss, between Astarion's furrowed brows. ]
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He allows the affection, although it doesn't quite soothe the frown lines on his face. Very intentionally, he shifts, lifting a hand and stroking Iorveth's cheek with the back of it, eyes as big and wide and sad as he can make them. He knows Iorveth is vulnerable to such things. ]
I was rather hoping you'd look into it now.
[ As if Astarion has the patience for a few decades. He already knows he wants to be with Iorveth forever and ever now. ]
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But. It's Astarion. And while the tactics are underhanded, they're employed right after "I don't want protection, I want you", which is―
―ugh. Ugh!!! It's such a low blow. How fucking dare Astarion make Iorveth love him so much, honestly. A beat passes, the struggle visible on Iorveth's stoic face, before he, for the millionth time tonight, folds like paper. ]
...If you wish it. [ "Iorveth Say No to Astarion Challenge: Failed". ] You can think about whether you really want to utilize whatever we find, later.
[ Like, the possibility of Astarion falling out of love with him in a century's time is not zero, so. It doesn't hurt to be careful. ]
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Iorveth should be rewarded for giving into him. It's one of his best qualities, as far as Astarion's concerned. ]
My love, [ he says in Aen Seidhe, still in that same horrible accent. ] You perfect man.
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He does have the inclination to say something along the lines of "hey, were you paying any attention to a word I said after "if you wish it"????"; Astarion is adorable, but he often doesn't think before he leaps. That said, he is adorable, so it nullifies a good chunk of the vexing shortsightedness.
A sigh, warm and low, and Iorveth nips Astarion's chin with exasperated affection. ]
My impatient cat. [ Giving the small of his back a little pat, the way one would, yes, do to a fluffy feline sitting on one's lap. ] You're getting too used to me saying "yes", I think.
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Astarion kisses the sharp angle of Iorveth's jaw, intimate but without any heat behind it save for the warmth of fondness and affection. He kisses Iorveth's high cheekbone next, then the corner of his eye. Touching for the sake of touching, kissing for the sake of kissing. Things he never thought he'd be able to enjoy, much less things he ever thought he'd feel the urge to do. ]
Are you going to start saying 'no' to me, darling?
[ Ha. He better not. Astarion has spent a lifetime hearing nothing but 'no'. Iorveth's 'yes'es are the sweetest sound he's ever heard. ]
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That said: ] If only you didn't make it so difficult.
[ And if only it didn't feel so good to spoil Astarion rotten. Sigh. Sometimes he thinks about the atrocities that Cazador committed against someone who wears happiness so beautifully; if only they could make little copies of that rat bastard to occasionally conjure and step on.
Iorveth meets Astarion's next kiss with his mouth, just because he knows he can get away with it. ]
I was expected to be a "good influence". [ A ridiculous notion. ]
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His lips meet Iorveth's enthusiastically, kiss firm and emphatic like he thinks he might be able to press Iorveth into the mattress with his kisses if he tries hard enough. He does love pinning Iorveth down with his weight so that he can't go anywhere. Is it toxic to like physically trapping your boyfriend so that he can't leave you? It's not like Astarion is going to stop, so the answer really doesn't matter. ]
By who?
[ Another kiss to the tip of his nose. ]
Not that I don't love your influence, of course.
[ But, you know, Iorveth is shockingly permissive of his bad behaviors. ]
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[ Sweet summer child. Literally. For all of Lae'zel's hemming and hawwing and sharp-edged judgment, she was... what, two decades old? An infant. Wise beyond her years in some respects, but terribly naive in others. ]
Though, in hindsight, I think she may have been referring to my potential to influence your combat strategies, and not your behavior.
[ For example, if Iorveth really wanted Astarion to get off of him, he can think of five different ways he could do so, with each tactic increasing in brutality and pain. The sort of thing Lae'zel is into. Unfortunately, he is stupidly permissive of the pinning, and makes no move to shove the lukewarm body crushing him into the mattress. His lungs aren't thanking him, but he doesn't care. ]
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Excuse me—
[ This happens to be the exact way he sounds when he thinks a shopkeep or bartender isn't giving him good enough service. ]
What's wrong with my combat strategies?
[ The answer could probably be summed up in a question: what combat strategies? Strategy is for boring people. You don't need strategy when you have a sharp enough knife. ]
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You don't often think beyond the first stab.
[ A milder way to phrase his original thought. ] Which is why you get punched in the face more often than not.
[ Astarion is very good at getting up close and personal without the other party knowing. It's everything after that that requires a bit of work. ]
A good thing, that I usually work from distances. I can cover you.
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Oh, are you going to protect me?
[ He turns his head, nuzzling into Iorveth's palm and kissing down his life line. Iorveth has created a monster, he thinks, one that's filled with embarrassingly warm and fuzzy feelings and can't stop himself from taking them out on every inch of Iorveth. ]
My hero.
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[ Protect Astarion, he means. If Astarion is a monstrous thing that soaks up attention like a sponge, Iorveth is a monstrous thing that supplies unhinged devotion in frankly unneeded quantities. Smiling at Astarion's willingness to settle in his hands, Iorveth trails his thumb just below one red eye― the one Iorveth is missing on his own face. ]
You, my most coveted and beloved. [ Said without a hint of embarrassment or self-consciousness. His truth will always be his truth, and he will always have unwarranted confidence about his beliefs. ] I'll protect you― not because I think you weak, but because it pleases me to see you safe.
[ A low hum, as he tickles behind Astarion's ear. ] You know, I nearly lost myself to rage when I thought those humans in Flotsam'd taken you from me.
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But the way that Iorveth says it, he supposes it doesn't sound so bad. Only from Iorveth can he ever think that something good doesn't come with strings attached. ]
Then you know how I feel when I think of mortality snatching you away.
[ The same, but different. More selfish, probably. He can't help what he is. ]
—Ugly of me, I suppose.
[ His beauty is only skin-deep, after all. Everything underneath is rather hideous. ]
But you've given me a reason to live, rather than just survive. I admit, I struggle to think of the future without you beside me.
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A careful consideration of what to say later, and Iorveth lands on a middle ground. He doesn't often dabble in these. ]
Time may grant you more perspective. [ Relinquishing his Astarion sandwich to comb through silver hair. He knows what this might sound like, though－ an out, which Iorveth has learned that Astarion does not like－ so he has a follow-up. ] ...But I, in turn, struggle to think of a future in which you're alone.
[ He hates it, actually. ]
So you'll have me for as long as you need me. And if you need me for longer than my prescripted years, we'll see what can be done. Challenges do intrigue me.
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