[ Iorveth reaches sideways towards the bedside dresser, and stops himself just before he accidentally uses their precious daywalking cloak as a handtowel. Crisis averted. He picks up one of the cloths he uses to clean his sword instead (he'll get a new one), and moves to gingerly wipe Astarion's hand after he tidies his own.
With that done: mandatory cuddling. Fingers comb through silver hair in a show of casual doting, interrupted by occasional rubs behind one pointed ear. ]
I'd thought we could detour to Baldur's Gate once more, before heading north. [ A lot of heavy lifting on Gale's part, having to portal them back and forth. It's that or camping again, and Iorveth is fairly certain that Astarion will want to choose the convenient option over sleeping on bedrolls on hard dirt. ] Perhaps we could extort the Duke for our marriage funds.
[ Things Iorveth has said to Wyll: "hey, your father fucking sucks and we shouldn't help him." Wyll wasn't pleased, to say the least. ]
[ Astarion instantly reaches over to curl around Iorveth as best he can with this stupid leg, nestled into the crooks of Iorveth's body like he belongs there. The sex is good, but the aftercare is better. He's impossibly lucky to have something like this. He's never, ever, ever giving it up, and that is a threat. ]
As I recall, the Duke wasn't our biggest fan.
[ You make a few comments about how Wyll was better off without him, anyway, and Duke Ravengard makes a whole big scene. Whatever. It's still right. Wyll is twice the man the Duke will ever be, Astarion thinks, even with his ridiculous tendency toward heroism. ]
But I wouldn't mind returning home for a bit.
[ Because that's what it still is to him, in a way. 'Home' isn't always good, but it's familiar. If the place he could navigate with his eyes closed isn't home, where is? ]
...Although I must admit I'm surprised you would want to. I thought you didn't care for the Gate.
[ Sure, Wyll was a foolish child with delusions of grandeur, but his contract with Mizora came from a place of unfathomable goodness. Wyll should have been scolded for thinking that he could depend on no one else, in Iorveth's not-so-expert opinion, but Duke Ravengard was a real ass for exiling his only son for making a poor choice. A typical human, in Iorveth's opinion. Short-sighted, caring only for appearances. The kind of human who deserves to be extorted by two deranged elves.
With that thought squared away, Iorveth is content to shower Astarion with the kind of affection that others have desperately tried to deter him from giving. Too thorough, too much. Treating him like the most special thing in the world, because he is. ]
I don't care for the humans governing it. [ Predictably. Astarion has not tried to deter Iorveth from his casual racism against and deep-seated resentment for humans, so Iorveth has not improved on this matter in the slightest. ] But I care for it in the sense of it being the place where I fell in love with you.
[ A quick kiss to Astarion's cheek, to cement the point. ]
...And Dolores will be happy to make something suitable for you to wear. For future occasions.
[ The place where I fell in love with you. Astarion will never not get a happy shiver up his spine at the reminder that Iorveth not only tolerates him, not only likes him, but loves him. The man who used to scornfully call him 'vampire', who once sent a note flying past his head via arrow. Sometimes he wishes it had all happened quicker, less messily, but—
There's not a moment he doesn't cherish, even the ones that made him furious. Oh, he's so impossibly down bad.
The mention of Dolores perks him up—how is that old biddy, he wonders—and the idea of her couture clothing more so. The future occasions most of all. He's still flushed from intimacy, but his face pinks a little more with pleasure, and he places his good hand on Iorveth's chest excitedly. He's less into wedding 'planning' and more into wedding 'fantasizing', but it's very, very fun to imagine it. ]
And for you, of course.
[ Gods, someone will have to stop him from trying to commission her to make Iorveth a whole new wardrobe. He's loved to dress Iorveth up ever since that ostentatious outfit in the Water Queen's House. ]
Something low-cut, to show off that lovely tattoo. [ And because he likes looking at Iorveth's chest, so what!! ] Should we match, do you think, or is that too unbearably twee? Something complementary, perhaps.
[ Down bad, Astarion thinks, and Iorveth mirrors the sentiment by boggling about how smitten he is. All it takes is for Astarion to look animated and enthused about anything at all for Iorveth to ensure that it happens; the worst thing in the world is giving his love false hope and seeing it pulled out from under him. Rational, sane people may argue that it's neither possible nor healthy to try to shield one person from all the world's ills, but damn if Iorveth won't try. ]
Anything, as long as it's not purple.
[ He huffs, a half-laugh as he takes Astarion's burned hand and tries to cast another round of Cure Wounds on it. It still doesn't help much at all, which is frustrating― as a consolation prize, he kisses the unburnt wrist and noses at it gently. ]
I've knowledge of many things, but fashion isn't one of them. You're free to dress me however you please for the occasion. [ Famous last words. ] ...Though I insist on embroidering one thing on whatever you choose to wear.
[ Although it's too tender to do so, Astarion longs to press the hand to Iorveth's cheek the way he'd done so long ago, in their room at the Elfsong, when they were still dancing awkwardly around each other. The both of them were too stubborn to admit the depth of their feeling back then, or perhaps too prideful even to realize it. If he could go back in time and tell himself to stop being such a fool and just love Iorveth already, he knows that he wouldn't listen to himself.
But he's long since overcome that hurdle, and how. He takes his uninjured hand and links it with Iorveth's instead. Holding Iorveth's hand is still the one thing he likes better than anything else, even now. All the sex in the world doesn't compare to the feeling of knowing Iorveth is right beside him and isn't going anywhere. ]
You are such a talented little seamstress these days.
[ One corner of his mouth tugs up a little further at the image of all of those crooked suns. ]
What will it be? A heart, perhaps? Another sun? Those are your specialty.
[ Neither little nor a seamstress, but Iorveth accepts the assessment anyway because it's delivered after handholding. Like Astarion's sleeve-tugging, the gesture makes Iorveth feel warm all over. ]
Hm. A sun may be too redundant. [ A gesture with his free hand towards the cloak. ] ...Perhaps some vines with leaves. On the collar.
[ Something that matches the visible portion of his tattoo. Is that also too twee? Maybe not Astarion's aesthetic, either. But he thinks it'd be nice to have something of him on Astarion's person. Feels correct, in a way; a proper union.
Still, because it's hardly his executive decision (Astarion will be the one who has to wear it), he offers: ] If it agrees with you, that is. [ The hand he'd used to gesture moves to settle on Astarion's cheek, pulsepoint near his mouth. It occurs to Iorveth, again, to let teeth sink in, and he encourages it implicitly by nudging that vulnerable bit of himself closer. ]
[ It dawns on him, slowly, what a luxury it is to lie around and chat with someone after intimacy. To have someone stick around rather than be dragged off kicking and screaming to somewhere terrible. To press himself against Iorveth's body and feel safe, unashamed. Gods, he loves this man; he presses his mouth against Iorveth's wrist, letting the contact linger as he closes his eyes, inhaling the sweet scent of Iorveth's skin and feeling his pulse beat against Astarion's lips. ]
It's your touch, my love. Of course it will agree with me.
[ Unless it's like, fucking ugly, but he'll let Iorveth down gently later if that's the case. No point in dwelling on that now!!
He drags his teeth over Iorveth's wrist, light, playful. ]
I hated having to subsist on that— man. [ He hated a lot of things about that situation, but most of them aren't very romantic, so he keeps his mouth shut. ] It's only you I want on my tongue.
[ Embroidering will potentially end up like this, and the real victim will be Dolores for having some asshole ruin her perfectly-tailored shirt. Still, Iorveth adds the needlework to his to-do list anyway, because he might as well commit to the Clown in Love title.
Astarion scrapes his pointy fangs over thin skin, and Iorveth renews his hatred for the hag, and his tangential dislike of Reginald (unfair, and Iorveth knows it), for leaving Astarion in pain. If not for that leg, Iorveth would be fully tangled and cuddled in for this, and not being able to do so is far more agonizing than he anticipated. ]
Your favored vintage. [ A half-quirk of his lips, as he drums his fingers lightly across Astarion's temple. ] Say so enough, and you really will make me a jealous man.
[ Again, Iorveth academically knows that Astarion should eat. In recent memory, he recalls that Damris had asked to sample his blood, and he also knows with one hundred percent certainty that that request had everything to do with dispassionate curiosity and nothing to do with attraction.
And yet. Iorveth glances down at Astarion and his pretty mouth, and still hates the thought of it on someone else. An absurd thing to think, since most people do not want to get bitten by a godsdamned vampire. ]
Will I? [ A mischievous grin. ] Well, then I'll say so every day.
[ Obviously, he thinks the idea of Iorveth's jealousy is— comforting, for one. Astarion is a wretched little beast, and he feels jealous of all the other people that have ever been the recipients of Iorveth's love. He has no one else to rival Iorveth, but it would be nice to know that, hypothetically, Iorveth might feel some jealousy at the thought. It's also kind of hot, whatever.
He refuses to stop holding Iorveth's hand (a wretched little beast, again) so he uses his injured hand to steady Iorveth's wrist, fingertips lightly brushing Iorveth's skin. It hurts a little, but it's all right. He'd weather any pain to for just one drop of Iorveth's blood in his throat. Also, he loves Iorveth a totally normal and sane amount, why would you even ask that??
His fangs pierce the skin just enough for blood to bead at the two pinprick punctures; he licks it up. ]
Mm. [ A pleased hum. ] You know, sometimes I think of my blood on your tongue.
[ In the context of making him a vampire—a true vampire!—which is an unachievable fantasy, but still good all the same. ]
[ Would it truly be hot to have a deranged elf glower at you from the other side of the room as you're trying to have dinner??? It's something that Astarion might have to deal with at some point or other, but for now, it's blissfully just the two of them (and Gale, occasionally, as he passes by the closed door and wonders if it's a good sort of closed door, or a bad sort of closed door).
It says something about the state of Iorveth's trust in Astarion that he barely even flinches when fangs cut through the thin layer of his skin and make a very vulnerable part of his body bleed. Iorveth has seen the way Astarion has fed on others－ with no care for the mess he makes or the pain he causes as a result－ but Astarion treats him with a kind of careful reverence that makes Iorveth wish he had more blood in his body to give.
A low exhale, and Iorveth presses his lips to the crown of Astarion's head. ]
The vampire ascendant, making a spawn?
[ There'd been mention that Astarion still thinks about what it would've been like if he'd completed the ritual. No judgment on Iorveth's part, but he isn't sure how he might have reacted to that particular power imbalance; he has no idea how the whole 'turning vampires into spawn' thing works, mechanically, nor does he really know how one could turn from spawn to vampire without the vampire killing his master. The politics of it all seem very messy. ]
[ Sometimes he fantasizes about that, too, when he's feeling particularly low. There's an appeal to making somebody who won't ever be able to leave him, couldn't possibly hurt him. But while a master can control a spawn physically, he still can't control their hearts (unbeating as they may be). He'd always know, somewhere deep down, that Iorveth didn't really love him, and it would make him go mad.
So: ] No. Well, not for long.
[ A vampire ascendant, maybe, but very soon not a spawn. He sucks gently at Iorveth's wrist, almost casual, like this is just as normal as post-coital cuddling. ]
If I fed you my own blood, then you'd be a true vampire. [ Teasing: ] Honestly, Iorveth, if you're going to be married to one, you really should brush up on the lore.
[ Slowly being drained, but happier for it. The fact that Iorveth isn't in any immediate danger makes it easier for him to let Astarion take as much as he can get away with, so he lists against Astarion's side, pliant and warm and pleased. ]
The lore, [ he snorts, but with no derision. ] Is there truly no way for you to become a true vampire, now that the unmentionable cretin is dead?
[ Not even going to speak Cazador's name into existence. Iorveth wonders if the unfinished ritual was truly Astarion's last chance, and if there's some other way for spawn to become vampires by virtue or... well, Iorveth doesn't know. Killing and biting another vampire lord, perhaps? Maybe they could have strung Alkam up and taken his blood; Damris had certainly wanted to.
Kissing Astarion's hair again, he appends: ] I wish to know about anything that may give you more freedom.
[ Which includes, yes, the lore. If Astarion isn't careful, Iorveth will start scheming again. ]
[ Astarion licks a few more times at the soft skin of Iorveth's wrist before he relinquishes it, fitting himself against Iorveth's body as best he can with this stupid leg in the way. Even worse than cockblocking, it's cuddleblocking him. ]
I don't know.
[ The lore isn't exactly his strong suit. He only knows the basics: you become a spawn, and then your master dangles the prospect of letting you drink his blood and become a true vampire in front of your face to torture you for two hundred years. Simple. ]
If there's a ritual to become a vampire ascendant, which, honestly, I'm not even certain is a real thing... [ It sounds fake!! How many fucking levels of vampire are there? ] ...then I'm sure there must be an alternative way to rise through the ranks from a spawn, as well.
[ With the power of devils on your side, it seems you can do just about anything. As long as you pay the price. ]
I guess I never gave it much thought, after— [ Giving up the ascendancy. He already sacrificed the greatest power he could ever have in the world; his lot in life was fairly cemented at that point. ]
[ How crazy would it have been, Iorveth thinks briefly, if Cazador did all that for dramatic reasons and the ritual didn't even work??? And how awful would it have been, if Astarion went ahead with the ritual in Cazador's stead, and it ended up in... who knows, him exploding or something equally as traumatizing? It's a good thing that they didn't consider ascendency－ no amount of power is worth the risk of Astarion losing any part of his current self.
With the feeding done, Iorveth takes his hand back to resume its very important job of petting Astarion's hair, slowly and carefully. ]
After I deterred you from world-changing power.
[ He finishes the sentence, since he's not in the habit of avoiding the truth, even if it doesn't paint him in the most flattering light. ]
You would be justified if you hated me for it, you realize.
[ If not for Iorveth, Astarion might be living in a mansion with 500 hot servants pouring wine over his naked body, or whatever it is that vampire ascendants do. He wouldn't be the Astarion that Iorveth loves now, but Astarion might have been happy regardless. ]
[ Ugh!! Another downside of these injuries: he can't both hold Iorveth's hand and pinch his cheek. Justified in hating Iorveth. Astarion could never be justified in hating him — and he could never hate him. Iorveth could betray him in every possible way, and there would still always be a part of him that longed for Iorveth's love. ]
The only reason to have that world-changing power is to protect you. [ Yes, he wants to be safe himself, but it's become less and less important. Not because he's somehow healed and found that the world is not an inherently dangerous place, but because he's simply shifted his neuroticism onto Iorveth's safety instead. ] The hag would have been a fine paste rubbed into that ugly carpet.
[ And it would have been glorious. If he had only ascended, he would have been able to save Iorveth, really save him, rather than just taking him and running. ]
...But I suppose seven thousand souls is quite a steep price to pay. [ He squeezes Iorveth's hand. ] And your disapproving scowl would have been too much to bear.
[ Iorveth simply just loves Astarion so fucking much. He holds Astarion sacred in a way that no sane person should, and is so concerned with Astarion's happiness to the point of parody: the only thing that scares Iorveth is the thought of anyone taking anything away from the man he loves.
Which is why he's floored by the assessment that Astarion wants to protect him. Iorveth has had lovers in the past, but he can't think of any that have said something like that out loud. It blindsides him (though it shouldn't, at this point), and makes him curl around Astarion, both reciprocally protective and also adoring. ]
Gods, you're perfect as you are.
[ Even if the cloak didn't protect Astarion from the sun, he would have been perfect anyway. He cups Astarion's face with one hand, keeping him in place to kiss all over his cheek, his forehead, his mouth. ]
Love of my life. I'd not change anything about you.
[ Iorveth doesn't need power or coin or prestige; he only wants Astarion, with all his complications and messiness. ]
[ Horrifically, Astarion actually giggles like a besotted schoolboy under the barrage of Iorveth's affection. Iorveth makes him feel— light. Unburdened. Like he really is young again, untouched and untainted. Like he's perfect the way he is. ]
I am particularly wonderful, [ he agrees. ] As are you. Hence why we make the perfect match.
[ There's only one thing he'd ever change about Iorveth, and it's that awful mortality. At least Iorveth isn't a human, or gods forbid, a halfling or gnome. He'd be beside himself if he thought he only had, what, fifty or sixty years before Iorveth's demise. No, he's lucky, really. Iorveth's elvenhood has never meant much to Astarion, but he's grateful for it. It gives him time. ]
...Besides, the whole 'turning you into a vampire' idea is really more of a plan B. I'd hate to bury you six feet under, darling, even for a day. And not only because you know I hate digging.
[ Although that's definitely part of it. Astarion's own death was one of the most traumatizing experiences of his existence. Forcing Iorveth to go through the same would be harrowing.
He'd do it, if he had to. But there are plenty of options to explore. ]
[ Iorveth doesn't care if he's laying it on thick; he kisses Astarion again, rewarding him for sweet behavior despite the horrific suggestion that the option of burying Iorveth underground for a day still exists. Deranged, Iorveth thinks that he'd endure it if it meant that Astarion wouldn't be lonely. ]
We'll do what we must.
[ He remembers Astarion saying that resurrection was as painful as it was terrifying, but those were different circumstances― Astarion was tortured by Cazador from the moment he was turned, but Iorveth knows what Astarion would never do the same to him, would never let him spend horrified hours scraping and digging his way out of dirt.
He squeezes Astarion's hand, enjoying that point of continued connection. ]
...I'd always thought it foolish, whenever I'd heard of humans trying to cheat death. Horror stories about lovers being brought back as mindless ghosts, and the like― I'd thought it a result of human hubris and pettiness.
[ He squeezes Astarion's hand again. ]
But now I imagine the absence of you― a complete absence, unyielding― and understand why others have been so compelled.
[ Astarion practically glows with happiness. Yes, that's exactly how he feels. An absence of Iorveth would be too terrible to bear. It seems very clear that the way his life has gone has been "no Iorveth = awful" and "yes Iorveth = pretty good"; an Iorveth is necessary for things to be all right. ]
Luckily for you, I've already cheated death.
[ Sure, that's discounting the fact that he very much can still die if (and when, probably) someone gets irritated enough with him to kill him, but at least that pesky old age won't get him. ]
Vampirism has its drawbacks, to be sure, but at least I'm not a hideous zombie like that Conway fellow.
[ He's referring to Connor, Mayrina's poor husband. ]
[ Most people have existential crises about eternal life and what it means to outlive everything until the end of eternity, but clearly, Astarion is not Most People. Iorveth would be more concerned about Astarion's short-sightedness if not for the simple fact that he's become complicit in encouraging aspects of it.
He has no idea who the hells Conway is, though. (Rude.) Oh well. Probably no one important. (Double rude.) ]
Yes, yes. [ A verbal eyeroll, affectionate. ] Not a hideous zombie, but the most beautiful vampire in Toril's history.
[ This would have sounded far more snide and sarcastic before; unfortunately for Iorveth, he actually believes this to be true now, so the jab doesn't quite land. More importantly, and on a bit more of a somber note, Iorveth hums under his breath and appends: ]
If my quest for eternal life goes awry, [ translation: 'If I become a hideous zombie', ] I expect you to kill me.
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With that done: mandatory cuddling. Fingers comb through silver hair in a show of casual doting, interrupted by occasional rubs behind one pointed ear. ]
I'd thought we could detour to Baldur's Gate once more, before heading north. [ A lot of heavy lifting on Gale's part, having to portal them back and forth. It's that or camping again, and Iorveth is fairly certain that Astarion will want to choose the convenient option over sleeping on bedrolls on hard dirt. ] Perhaps we could extort the Duke for our marriage funds.
[ Things Iorveth has said to Wyll: "hey, your father fucking sucks and we shouldn't help him." Wyll wasn't pleased, to say the least. ]
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As I recall, the Duke wasn't our biggest fan.
[ You make a few comments about how Wyll was better off without him, anyway, and Duke Ravengard makes a whole big scene. Whatever. It's still right. Wyll is twice the man the Duke will ever be, Astarion thinks, even with his ridiculous tendency toward heroism. ]
But I wouldn't mind returning home for a bit.
[ Because that's what it still is to him, in a way. 'Home' isn't always good, but it's familiar. If the place he could navigate with his eyes closed isn't home, where is? ]
...Although I must admit I'm surprised you would want to. I thought you didn't care for the Gate.
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With that thought squared away, Iorveth is content to shower Astarion with the kind of affection that others have desperately tried to deter him from giving. Too thorough, too much. Treating him like the most special thing in the world, because he is. ]
I don't care for the humans governing it. [ Predictably. Astarion has not tried to deter Iorveth from his casual racism against and deep-seated resentment for humans, so Iorveth has not improved on this matter in the slightest. ] But I care for it in the sense of it being the place where I fell in love with you.
[ A quick kiss to Astarion's cheek, to cement the point. ]
...And Dolores will be happy to make something suitable for you to wear. For future occasions.
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There's not a moment he doesn't cherish, even the ones that made him furious. Oh, he's so impossibly down bad.
The mention of Dolores perks him up—how is that old biddy, he wonders—and the idea of her couture clothing more so. The future occasions most of all. He's still flushed from intimacy, but his face pinks a little more with pleasure, and he places his good hand on Iorveth's chest excitedly. He's less into wedding 'planning' and more into wedding 'fantasizing', but it's very, very fun to imagine it. ]
And for you, of course.
[ Gods, someone will have to stop him from trying to commission her to make Iorveth a whole new wardrobe. He's loved to dress Iorveth up ever since that ostentatious outfit in the Water Queen's House. ]
Something low-cut, to show off that lovely tattoo. [ And because he likes looking at Iorveth's chest, so what!! ] Should we match, do you think, or is that too unbearably twee? Something complementary, perhaps.
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Anything, as long as it's not purple.
[ He huffs, a half-laugh as he takes Astarion's burned hand and tries to cast another round of Cure Wounds on it. It still doesn't help much at all, which is frustrating― as a consolation prize, he kisses the unburnt wrist and noses at it gently. ]
I've knowledge of many things, but fashion isn't one of them. You're free to dress me however you please for the occasion. [ Famous last words. ] ...Though I insist on embroidering one thing on whatever you choose to wear.
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But he's long since overcome that hurdle, and how. He takes his uninjured hand and links it with Iorveth's instead. Holding Iorveth's hand is still the one thing he likes better than anything else, even now. All the sex in the world doesn't compare to the feeling of knowing Iorveth is right beside him and isn't going anywhere. ]
You are such a talented little seamstress these days.
[ One corner of his mouth tugs up a little further at the image of all of those crooked suns. ]
What will it be? A heart, perhaps? Another sun? Those are your specialty.
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Hm. A sun may be too redundant. [ A gesture with his free hand towards the cloak. ] ...Perhaps some vines with leaves. On the collar.
[ Something that matches the visible portion of his tattoo. Is that also too twee? Maybe not Astarion's aesthetic, either. But he thinks it'd be nice to have something of him on Astarion's person. Feels correct, in a way; a proper union.
Still, because it's hardly his executive decision (Astarion will be the one who has to wear it), he offers: ] If it agrees with you, that is. [ The hand he'd used to gesture moves to settle on Astarion's cheek, pulsepoint near his mouth. It occurs to Iorveth, again, to let teeth sink in, and he encourages it implicitly by nudging that vulnerable bit of himself closer. ]
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It's your touch, my love. Of course it will agree with me.
[ Unless it's like, fucking ugly, but he'll let Iorveth down gently later if that's the case. No point in dwelling on that now!!
He drags his teeth over Iorveth's wrist, light, playful. ]
I hated having to subsist on that— man. [ He hated a lot of things about that situation, but most of them aren't very romantic, so he keeps his mouth shut. ] It's only you I want on my tongue.
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Astarion scrapes his pointy fangs over thin skin, and Iorveth renews his hatred for the hag, and his tangential dislike of Reginald (unfair, and Iorveth knows it), for leaving Astarion in pain. If not for that leg, Iorveth would be fully tangled and cuddled in for this, and not being able to do so is far more agonizing than he anticipated. ]
Your favored vintage. [ A half-quirk of his lips, as he drums his fingers lightly across Astarion's temple. ] Say so enough, and you really will make me a jealous man.
[ Again, Iorveth academically knows that Astarion should eat. In recent memory, he recalls that Damris had asked to sample his blood, and he also knows with one hundred percent certainty that that request had everything to do with dispassionate curiosity and nothing to do with attraction.
And yet. Iorveth glances down at Astarion and his pretty mouth, and still hates the thought of it on someone else. An absurd thing to think, since most people do not want to get bitten by a godsdamned vampire. ]
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[ Obviously, he thinks the idea of Iorveth's jealousy is— comforting, for one. Astarion is a wretched little beast, and he feels jealous of all the other people that have ever been the recipients of Iorveth's love. He has no one else to rival Iorveth, but it would be nice to know that, hypothetically, Iorveth might feel some jealousy at the thought. It's also kind of hot, whatever.
He refuses to stop holding Iorveth's hand (a wretched little beast, again) so he uses his injured hand to steady Iorveth's wrist, fingertips lightly brushing Iorveth's skin. It hurts a little, but it's all right. He'd weather any pain to for just one drop of Iorveth's blood in his throat. Also, he loves Iorveth a totally normal and sane amount, why would you even ask that??
His fangs pierce the skin just enough for blood to bead at the two pinprick punctures; he licks it up. ]
Mm. [ A pleased hum. ] You know, sometimes I think of my blood on your tongue.
[ In the context of making him a vampire—a true vampire!—which is an unachievable fantasy, but still good all the same. ]
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It says something about the state of Iorveth's trust in Astarion that he barely even flinches when fangs cut through the thin layer of his skin and make a very vulnerable part of his body bleed. Iorveth has seen the way Astarion has fed on others－ with no care for the mess he makes or the pain he causes as a result－ but Astarion treats him with a kind of careful reverence that makes Iorveth wish he had more blood in his body to give.
A low exhale, and Iorveth presses his lips to the crown of Astarion's head. ]
The vampire ascendant, making a spawn?
[ There'd been mention that Astarion still thinks about what it would've been like if he'd completed the ritual. No judgment on Iorveth's part, but he isn't sure how he might have reacted to that particular power imbalance; he has no idea how the whole 'turning vampires into spawn' thing works, mechanically, nor does he really know how one could turn from spawn to vampire without the vampire killing his master. The politics of it all seem very messy. ]
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So: ] No. Well, not for long.
[ A vampire ascendant, maybe, but very soon not a spawn. He sucks gently at Iorveth's wrist, almost casual, like this is just as normal as post-coital cuddling. ]
If I fed you my own blood, then you'd be a true vampire. [ Teasing: ] Honestly, Iorveth, if you're going to be married to one, you really should brush up on the lore.
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The lore, [ he snorts, but with no derision. ] Is there truly no way for you to become a true vampire, now that the unmentionable cretin is dead?
[ Not even going to speak Cazador's name into existence. Iorveth wonders if the unfinished ritual was truly Astarion's last chance, and if there's some other way for spawn to become vampires by virtue or... well, Iorveth doesn't know. Killing and biting another vampire lord, perhaps? Maybe they could have strung Alkam up and taken his blood; Damris had certainly wanted to.
Kissing Astarion's hair again, he appends: ] I wish to know about anything that may give you more freedom.
[ Which includes, yes, the lore. If Astarion isn't careful, Iorveth will start scheming again. ]
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I don't know.
[ The lore isn't exactly his strong suit. He only knows the basics: you become a spawn, and then your master dangles the prospect of letting you drink his blood and become a true vampire in front of your face to torture you for two hundred years. Simple. ]
If there's a ritual to become a vampire ascendant, which, honestly, I'm not even certain is a real thing... [ It sounds fake!! How many fucking levels of vampire are there? ] ...then I'm sure there must be an alternative way to rise through the ranks from a spawn, as well.
[ With the power of devils on your side, it seems you can do just about anything. As long as you pay the price. ]
I guess I never gave it much thought, after— [ Giving up the ascendancy. He already sacrificed the greatest power he could ever have in the world; his lot in life was fairly cemented at that point. ]
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With the feeding done, Iorveth takes his hand back to resume its very important job of petting Astarion's hair, slowly and carefully. ]
After I deterred you from world-changing power.
[ He finishes the sentence, since he's not in the habit of avoiding the truth, even if it doesn't paint him in the most flattering light. ]
You would be justified if you hated me for it, you realize.
[ If not for Iorveth, Astarion might be living in a mansion with 500 hot servants pouring wine over his naked body, or whatever it is that vampire ascendants do. He wouldn't be the Astarion that Iorveth loves now, but Astarion might have been happy regardless. ]
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The only reason to have that world-changing power is to protect you. [ Yes, he wants to be safe himself, but it's become less and less important. Not because he's somehow healed and found that the world is not an inherently dangerous place, but because he's simply shifted his neuroticism onto Iorveth's safety instead. ] The hag would have been a fine paste rubbed into that ugly carpet.
[ And it would have been glorious. If he had only ascended, he would have been able to save Iorveth, really save him, rather than just taking him and running. ]
...But I suppose seven thousand souls is quite a steep price to pay. [ He squeezes Iorveth's hand. ] And your disapproving scowl would have been too much to bear.
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Which is why he's floored by the assessment that Astarion wants to protect him. Iorveth has had lovers in the past, but he can't think of any that have said something like that out loud. It blindsides him (though it shouldn't, at this point), and makes him curl around Astarion, both reciprocally protective and also adoring. ]
Gods, you're perfect as you are.
[ Even if the cloak didn't protect Astarion from the sun, he would have been perfect anyway. He cups Astarion's face with one hand, keeping him in place to kiss all over his cheek, his forehead, his mouth. ]
Love of my life. I'd not change anything about you.
[ Iorveth doesn't need power or coin or prestige; he only wants Astarion, with all his complications and messiness. ]
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I am particularly wonderful, [ he agrees. ] As are you. Hence why we make the perfect match.
[ There's only one thing he'd ever change about Iorveth, and it's that awful mortality. At least Iorveth isn't a human, or gods forbid, a halfling or gnome. He'd be beside himself if he thought he only had, what, fifty or sixty years before Iorveth's demise. No, he's lucky, really. Iorveth's elvenhood has never meant much to Astarion, but he's grateful for it. It gives him time. ]
...Besides, the whole 'turning you into a vampire' idea is really more of a plan B. I'd hate to bury you six feet under, darling, even for a day. And not only because you know I hate digging.
[ Although that's definitely part of it. Astarion's own death was one of the most traumatizing experiences of his existence. Forcing Iorveth to go through the same would be harrowing.
He'd do it, if he had to. But there are plenty of options to explore. ]
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We'll do what we must.
[ He remembers Astarion saying that resurrection was as painful as it was terrifying, but those were different circumstances― Astarion was tortured by Cazador from the moment he was turned, but Iorveth knows what Astarion would never do the same to him, would never let him spend horrified hours scraping and digging his way out of dirt.
He squeezes Astarion's hand, enjoying that point of continued connection. ]
...I'd always thought it foolish, whenever I'd heard of humans trying to cheat death. Horror stories about lovers being brought back as mindless ghosts, and the like― I'd thought it a result of human hubris and pettiness.
[ He squeezes Astarion's hand again. ]
But now I imagine the absence of you― a complete absence, unyielding― and understand why others have been so compelled.
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Luckily for you, I've already cheated death.
[ Sure, that's discounting the fact that he very much can still die if (and when, probably) someone gets irritated enough with him to kill him, but at least that pesky old age won't get him. ]
Vampirism has its drawbacks, to be sure, but at least I'm not a hideous zombie like that Conway fellow.
[ He's referring to Connor, Mayrina's poor husband. ]
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He has no idea who the hells Conway is, though. (Rude.) Oh well. Probably no one important. (Double rude.) ]
Yes, yes. [ A verbal eyeroll, affectionate. ] Not a hideous zombie, but the most beautiful vampire in Toril's history.
[ This would have sounded far more snide and sarcastic before; unfortunately for Iorveth, he actually believes this to be true now, so the jab doesn't quite land. More importantly, and on a bit more of a somber note, Iorveth hums under his breath and appends: ]
If my quest for eternal life goes awry, [ translation: 'If I become a hideous zombie', ] I expect you to kill me.